Kelly sits up alone!!!

Well, yesterday, Saturday August 30, 2008, was a really big historic day for us. Kelly sat alone...unassisted. I was so tickled pink! She was sitting
beside me with me holding on to her and I just happened to let go and
she stayed up!! And I looked at her and could not believe it. And then
I yelled at the AuPair to look and my oldest daughter and we all just
stared in disbelief. It was the coolest thing ever. She used her hand
to prop her and support her and she sat there alone for about a
minute. That is a good start, don't ya think!! WHOOO HOOO
For those of you that do not understand what a monumental issue this is, let me explain a bit more. Kelly has spastic quadrapelegic Cerebral Palsy. She has high tone in her arms and legs and low tone in her head, neck and trunk. This means it was an accomplishment when she started holding her head up back in January at 14 months of age. I was really not sure if she would ever have trunk control but that muscle has been developing slowly over the last half year. We were loaned a Rabbit StanderR82 and I think that helped her too. Her doctor feels like she is doing so well that she does not need a vest or corset to help her with her trunk muscles. Many kids with CP that have low tone in their trunk must wear a support system like this and many do not sit up unassisted. I am hoping this is the beginning of big things for Kelly.
When we put baby Sarah on the floor with her, she gets really excited and tries to crawl toward her. She is moving the legs correctly but has not gotten the arms going right yet. That is why the trunk strength is also so important. She needs that body strength to get herself propelled forward. We are thrilled. I am now actually feeling hopeful and believing that she may some day walk!! All the therapy, tears, prayers and pain are paying off.
Way to go Kelly Jelly Belly!!!

Wow, What a Sister

Kelly has been blessed in the fact that so far she has only had problems with her muscles and movements. There are so many children out there and so many different problems and faces. I just pray we all learn a little bit of patience, love, and acceptance for them all.

Morning Mama

I am not a morning person. Ask my dad and ask my husband. My dad knew me the first part of my life and now my husband gets to enjoy my company during the remainder, but that is not possible mornings. So, normally, I try to go to bed early in order to get 8 hours of sleep. With 8 hours, I am super! Now, however, with the birth of baby number five, I am not getting 8 hours of sleep. I am starting to sleep for 4 hours at a stretch and that can do wonders but it is still not enough and my daytime hours are absolutely nuts here. There is always someone needing me, touching me, talking to me, interrupting the other person talking to me to talk to me, following me into the bathroom, needing to be stretched, needing to be taught to potty on the potty, needing to learn to read, needing to breastfeed, needing to be reassured they are a good man, needing to be placed in their stander, needing to be played with, needing to be placed in their pony, needing to be placed on their tummy for “tummy-time”, needing to be cheered and encouraged when doing stressful Vojta therapy…and the list goes on. That can be in a one our period mind you. I am not kidding one single bit, my life is nuts.
So, we get to this blogging idea of mine. I want to keep up with the 5 girls is enough (yes, I know the grammar sounds off, it is supposed to be a joke like 8 is enough) website and devote it to my family and especially our battle against the all encompassing, evil Cerebral Palsy and give hope and inspiration to others. I also want to do that with my other blog 5 girls on a budget for the same reasons except to highlight our journey on an extremely tight budget and again give inspiration and ideas to others. But how on earth can I possibly sit down and read emails or write a blog for goodness sake when I do not even eat regularly or shower at this point?? I know it will get a bit better because baby Sarah will eventually sleep through the night. But either way, I have come to an adult decision. I have to get up before the family does if I want to have one moment of peace to think and dream and write. I know this is not a new idea, many women have done it and I have read about it and heard about it for years, but I had no idea how true it was going to be in my life. For the sake of my sanity, I need to have alone time so that I am strong enough to give all the love and things to my family that each of the 6 individual people need. I thought about staying up late, after the kids are in bed, but then my husband is awake and he wants his husband time. That is fair, he needs me too. But I need me too. So, I begin my journey as an early riser. Well, at least I did it today. We will see about tomorrow. I think it is going to be absolutely the only way that I can keep my sanity, or at least a semblance of my sanity!

Baby Sarah Comes Home

I enjoyed a few days alone in the hospital getting to know Daughter number Five. We did have a few problems with the fact her blood sugar was really low and we had to give her glucose till my milk came in. It was so low they almost took her to NICU…reliving the nightmare of the twins? But, we made it to a normal number with much stress but finally success. She was very yellow but again, right on the bare minimal borderline. All of this was due to my diabetes.
She and I cuddled and cooed and enjoyed being together alone for the first time in her life and one of very few times.







With four other sisters, it is almost impossible to get alone time with Momma (ask Papa). But, Momma got homesick and after 3 days, they would have kept me up to 5, I asked to be discharged so I could go home and see the other little girls.
Katja came to the hospital with Papa to make sure I did not forget something important, like Baby Sarah!!!




Kelly was awake from naptime when we got home. The look on her face was priceless. Like Katja did the first time, Kelly lit up very bright. Her eyes were very wide and her mouth was open as if to say “Wow, what a wonderful thing that is. Is it mine?” She wanted to hold the baby. Kelly has CP and does not have that much control of her hands but I laid baby Sarah beside her on the large beanbag chair. Kelly very gently touched Sarah’s face. She knew exactly what to do. I was so proud of her. And then Kelly did the most amazing thing. She said very clearly, “Sarah.” Well, that took care of any worries I might have had about Kelly having speech difficulties. She said Sarah more clearly than some adults do. My father-in-law was still of the mind that Kelly was not very smart. He had even said that he did not think Kelly would even notice the new baby. I guess she proved him wrong!!

Sabrina got up from naptime and was walking around in my room. I went up to her and told her I had something to show her. She saw the baby in my arms and saw that it was moving! She took a step back and gave a gasp. I think it scared her a bit. She was not really sure what to think. It took her several days to warm up to the baby. Now we cannot keep her away!

So, we got home just fine and the next day Erika and Andreas hit the road home. They were very happy to be going home. I was very sad to see them leave. But luckily for us, Nanny Sarah was on her way from Canada and would arrive May 1st. That is a story for another post.

Introducing Baby Sarah, Baby Number 5

In an attempt to catch up on this blogging thing I am going to go backwards and attempt to do justice to the wonderful events of the last 4 months.
So I will begin with one of the most important events we have experienced this year, the birth of daughter number 5.
Introducing Sarah Jessica Meyer, no not Parker!! She does not have a copy write.
Sarah was born into the Meyer girls club on April 20, 2008 during the 37th week of pregnancy. We decided to induce the labor because of my gestational diabetes. Glad we did because she was a bigun (Texan for big one). She weighed in at over 3560 grams which is 7 pounds 8 ounces. She also had a bigger head circumference than the other kiddos, ouch. Sarah was born at the same hospital as the rest of the last 4 girls, Hannover’s University Hospital or MHH. It was like going home and being among friends because I lived there for 10 weeks as I was pregnant with the twins. The nurses, midwives and doctors all know me and my children by name. That made it nice. On a side note, the midwife in charge of my birth made the experience terrible but in an effort to let things go, I will not go into detail. I thought about writing a letter and complaining because she refused to give me the second dose of my epidural medicine, even though the doctor said she could and should. And even though I have a recorded back problem. Needless to say, I have never had that type of pain and that is from an experienced mother who has now done the birth thing this way: first time with epidural (perfect birth), second no epidural because it was too late but my back was not as bad as it is now and I had a shot of something, third experience was with a C-Section and then lastly I did this half and half thing where the epidural wore off. I know some of you think, “OH buck it up, it was just normal childbirth pain!” You that say that have no idea what you are talking about. I have a problem with the vertebrae in my spine and will need surgery eventually. I take some form of Morphine regularly and needed the last dose to keep the epidural going. I had done the childbirth thing the natural way once before and wanted my last experience to be as wonderful as my first but the mighty, evil midwife took care of that. No, I am not holding grudges over it, I am just fine. Oh, and she also refused to give me an episiotomy, which I had had with the other births. She just did not think it was necessary even though Sarah was a big baby with a big head…errrrrr.
SOOOOOO
Let me tell you about Sarah. She is so pretty. She has dark hair, blue eyes (I know all anglo babies have them but in our case, she will probably keep them) like 3 of her older sisters, and these lovely, long eyelashes that curl up so pretty. I think she got the eyelashes from my mother who told a story that she had long, curling eyelashes till her older sister, who was jealous, cut them off at naptime one day.
The first two sisters to meet her were Samantha and Katja.


Let me tell you, Katja was thrilled. She wanted to take her home right away. She was not concerned at all about Momma, just baby Sarah. She almost did not leave the hospital room because she wanted to be sure that we were not going to forget Sarah and that she would get to come home with us.

Then Katja really started to check Baby Sarah out...

"Wow, Momma, she is a real baby! She is not in your tummy anymore!!"


Then finally, Katja allowed Samantha to hold baby Sarah. She supervised the whole thing, in case Samantha dropped her baby sister.

OCCUPATION: HOUSEWIFE

JOB DESCRIPTION: You will be expected to 'live in' at place of work and provide cleaning, cooking, shopping, laundry, psychotherapeutic, nursing, teaching, entertainment and secretarial services for other inmates.

HOURS: You will be 'on call' 24 hours a day, 385 days a year, especially for psychotherapeutic and nursing services. But your regular work will take between 50 and 100 hours per week1, depending on: age, health and number of children or disabled people in household; standards of work demanded by employer; size and condition of house.

PAYMENT: An allowance is available, known as 'housekeeping money' when provided by employer and 'family allowance' or 'child benefit' when provided by the State. This money is intended to cover essential expenses such as cleaning utensils and food. There is no payment for your labour as housewife. Three out of four housewives have no money of their own and were described as 'financially battered' in a 1978 report in the UK. In 1975, with inflation at 26 per cent, only 25 per cent of UK housewives received an increase in housekeeping money from their employers. Seventy per cent of husbands in the UK, 40 per cent in West Germany and 30 per cent in Switzerland do not tell their wives what they earn.

HOLIDAYS: Your duties will be eased if your holiday is taken in a hotel, but you will often be expected simply to do your normal work in strange surroundings while other household members enjoy their leisure. Research in Germany found only 21 per cent of housewives had a holiday the previous year, compared with 86 per cent of employers (husbands).

SATISFACTION: You may find your duties even more monotonous, fragmented and under continuous time pressure than assembly-line workers6. Seventy per cent of housewives in one study said they were 'very' or 'severely' dissatisfied with the nature of their work. Two-thirds of working-class housewives and three quarters of middle-class housewives would like an extra job outside the home - largely because of frustration with their work in the home.


WORK HAZARDS: You will be 154 per cent more likely to die of cancer than women in paid employment. Between 40 and 80 per cent of housewives in Bracknell New Town, UK, have an alcohol problem8. One in five Aotearoan housewives seek help for psychiatric symptoms - more than any other occupational group - and Australian women consume 70 per cent of all minor tranquilizers in the country. Insomnia, palpitations, headaches, dizziness, nightmares and anxiety ('housewives' syndrome') are much more common among housewives than women in paid employment.

JOB SECURITY: Your job will be continuously and increasingly threatened by divorce. In the US one in six marriages ended in divorce in 1940. Today two out of every three marriages are predicted to end in divorce'. One year after divorce the divorced housewife's standard of living drops by 73 percent, while that of her ex-employer rises by 42 per cent.

REDUNDANCY PAYMENTS: If made redundant (by divorce) you will only have a one-in-seven chance of being awarded alimony (money for your personal support) in the US. Though 60 per cent of redundant housewives have children, 60 per cent of ex-employers contribute no money at all to the upkeep of those children. Two-thirds of ex-employers are ordered (by divorce courts) to pay less in support of their children than they owe in monthly car repayments. Nearly all keep up their car payments but over half are delinquent with child support. Unpaid child support totals $4 billion a year in the US.

FRINGE BENEFITS: Your board and lodgings will usually be provided, but you will normally be expected to share a bedroom (and bed) with your employer.

Source:http://www.newint.org/issue181/occupation.htm

WELCOME TO HOLLAND

by
Emily Perl Kingsley.

c1987 by Emily Perl Kingsley. All rights reserved

I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability - to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this......

When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.

After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."

"Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."

But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.

The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.

So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.

It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around.... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills....and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.

But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy... and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."

And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away... because the loss of that dream is a very very significant loss.

But... if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ... about Holland.